Apparently 2018 is a big year for our family – the wedding, our little man turning two, and we have found out we are expecting Baby Groot #2! We are beyond excited and Mr. Jace is especially excited to be a big brother, and already showers his little brother or sister with kisses by kissing my belly.
Now every Mama that has been pregnant or is currently pregnant knows how crappy the first trimester can be. If you are a first time Mama currently in your first trimester, just know it gets easier from here on out! I am 14 weeks today and have officially made it out of that first trimester, but let me tell you it was a lot harder to deal with the nausea and constant exhaustion with a toddler to take care of – thank goodness for my amazing husband – and these little tips I tried to follow!
Prepare for things ahead of time when you have the energy.
The constant exhaustion is so hard to fight when your energetic toddler is running around the house going “Mommy, GRRR, GRRR!” and just wanting to play “monsters” with you, or when your toddler is listening to their favorite kids CD and says “Mommy, dance!”. In these little moments there was no way I could say no even if I felt like I could literally sleep for two days straight, because even though I may have felt that way I know that one day Mr. Jace isn’t going to want me to play monster or dance like a crazy person in his room with me, plus his giggle and smile just light up my world so it makes it completely worth it.
So when you have a slight burst of energy (even if it is for five minutes) think of what you can prepare ahead of time so you can relax when you do feel exhausted. For example, I always pick Jace’s clothes out and prep anything he needs for the next day the night before so on work mornings not much needs to be done; however, with this pregnancy I had more nausea at night and was exhausted by the time it was time to get Jace ready for bed at 7pm so I would prep all of his stuff for the day before, get all of his bed time and bath time stuff ready when I got home from work so that when the exhaustion and nausea hit I could sit down and relax. Make sure you check out Bed time routine – FUN! and A list of Sunday errands & To-Do’s.
Ask for HELP
Now this seems self explanatory but us Mamas seem to forget to do this quite a bit. It is completely okay to ask for help. Rely on your significant other a bit more, and if you do not have a significant other, ask for help from friends or family. There is always going to be someone willing to help you out.
I relied on Robert a huge amount these last couple months. There were days I would get home from work and literally my but would hit the couch and if I stood up I was basically running to the washroom because of the nausea. This meant he cooked a lot of dinners on days I couldn’t, he tidied up the house when I couldn’t, and most importantly he made me rest when I tried refusing to (even though I may have been really stubborn at times – oops!).
Explain to your toddler why Mommy is not feeling well
Jace has always been a very high energy little man and is very energetic and loves to rough house. When we first found out we were expecting, we took the time to sit down with Jace and explain that we were going to have a baby and he was going to be a big brother. Now at first we weren’t to sure he understood it but everyday we would talk about it in different ways, bring up the baby in Mommy’s tummy, ask him if he is excited to be a big brother, ask him if he is going to help Mommy and Daddy feed the baby, change the baby, or give the baby its soother. Eventually you could see he started to understand a little bit and now if you ask him if he is excited to be a big brother he usually gets very excited.
We think our toddlers are not going to understand certain things but it is all about the way you explain it to them. We try to take the approach of having no distractions because if there is a distraction, chances are your toddler isn’t listening to you in the first place.
On the real bad days when I would come home from work, we would explain to Jace that Mommy really isn’t feeling well today and is sick, that Daddy was going to make some dinner and Mommy wanted to snuggle and watch a movie with him. This generally worked and occasionally he would get all sympathetic and bring me his blanky and “Blueberry” (blue elephant stuffie he carries everywhere) and then kiss me and tell me he loves me… seriously melts my heart every time.
Be easy on yourself and let go of your expectations
As I have mentioned before, I am the definition of a neat freak. I like things to be organized, in order, and things to run smoothly. Now, since being in this first trimester with our little bean I have definitely had to learn to let go of some of my expectations. Some days it is a lot easier said than done but it is so, so important because you need to take the time to rest for you and your bun in the oven.
As I mentioned earlier, Robert was great for reminding me when I was overdoing it and when I needed to take a break. I give him props for this because sometimes telling me to simply sit down and rest is definitely not the easiest thing because it is something I rarely do. I always have some sort of project I am doing, something I am cleaning, something I need to accomplish and when they don’t get done I get a little frantic. I definitely don’t realize when I am pushing myself to far and that little reminder is definitely helpful (even though I would never admit that at the time).
Remember to relax – the dishes, the floors, the laundry, it can all wait an extra day or two and the house isn’t going to fall apart if it does!
Well this Mama is off to snooze because after a week of vacation time, I am sure I will be wiped after a day of work tomorrow! Stay tuned for some more struggles, chaos & fun from this Mediocre Mommy! ❤